There is no language that can adequately describe what one goes through when your animal friends leave you ... even though we know all along that we are most likely to outlive them, nothing really prepares us for this heart wrenching period. Hopey's role description was to soak us all in his love. Constantly. As simple or as profound as this. That's all. This was his role for his entire lifetime. And now he was not around any more. I was playing some music to just keep me going. My all time preference is Carnatic music. I could feel Hopey's presence so strongly. And M S was singing so soulfully. As always. I was playing Bhavamulona bhagyamulandhunu. It is a ritual in our house to listen to her Visnusahasranama and Bhajagovindam. In fact a schedule has formed on its own over years, so there are specific times in the day for Hanuman chalisa, Kanakadhara stotra and so on. And this little puppy entered our lives at the peak of festival season. So he was initiated very early on into our way of life. He would be such an unstoppable brat but the moment " OM .. Shuklam bharadharam Vishnum .." would begin, he would transform .. he would so sweetly climb into a nearby lap and would not stir until it was over ... where are you Hopey..? And just then, MS sings "Vishnuvu vishnuvani vedakavo ... manasaa". O mind, do not search for Vishnu as Vishnu ..
Something shifted within me. I could not recognise it but I could feel I was headed towards an oasis, having traversed barrenness. I would count this as one of those significant moments of this lifetime for the leap I made. It was most unlike any other, so far. This was inward. This was a serenity that I had felt only three or four times earlier. It was different also in the fact that it did not reveal itself readily. These moments of knowing or knowledge, if I may call them that, have a way of presenting themselves so solemnly ... a fleeting glimpse, an imperceptible feeling or some strange prodding to seek some book or meet someone. Some invisible thread of connection seems to run through it all ... and life goes on ..
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